Sea Shanty of the Tentacle-whalers: "The Maiden Rednanroah"
As sung aboard the tentacling vessel Shepherd’s Pincer
The Maiden Rednanroah
Far beyond the Mede, my friends, far past most distant reaches Lies maiden fair Rednanroah, gold upon its beaches Its trees bear fruit so honey-sweet; its islanders, they beckon To sailor boys and sailor girls with bosoms there to lay on (Chorus) Rednanroah, we sail for you Sand white as mother’s milk Oh maiden fair, betrothed to you Oh nonnie-nonnie-no-ah!
But curséd be Rednanroah, for shielding her virtue Are corals not nor pirates too, but lithe and strong lassos They grasp and writhe, like snakes they strike any who would approach With suckers puck’d and muscles struck they creep and they encroach (Chorus) Rednanroah, we sail for you Sand white as mother’s milk Oh maiden fair, betrothed to you Oh nonnie-nonnie-no-ah! Rednanroah blazing in their sights, no sailors hear them coming Until the cries ring loud and high and the massacre is wringing They pluck out seamen’s groins with ease, they rend seawomen’s breasts They thrash and stab and whip and grab, immune to your damndest (Chorus) Rednanroah, we sail for you Sand white as mother’s milk Oh maiden fair, betrothed to you Oh nonnie-nonnie-no-ah!
The tentacles rip you apart, they poke you through and through They tighten all around your hull and crush your vessel too And if you’re still alive somehow, the worst is coming yet They’ll pull you down into the depths and feed you to their nests (Chorus) Rednanroah, we sail for you Sand white as mother’s milk Oh maiden fair, betrothed to you Oh nonnie-nonnie-no-ah! So sailor, should you ever see sweet Rednanroah’s sway Pull hard to port and turn away: She is not yours to lay For we seek Rednanroah true, we’ll clear away her curse It might take years, and years yet more, but we shall not reverse-ah! (Chorus) Rednanroah, we sail for you Sand white as mother’s milk Oh maiden fair, betrothed to you Oh nonnie-nonnie-no-ah!
Epic!
Excellent!